I love fashion but I hate you.

Outdated Fashions? No such thing for the PMG

GREETINGS READER:

A good friend forwarded me the following link from The Art of Manliness on the art of said manliness. A fine list of things that any good man of style will quickly find in his closet, or at least will recognize as being worthy of consideration.

I promise the article is about style, and not gold diggers.

I promise the article is about style, and not gold diggers.

One of the tenents of a Postmodern Gent is that truly great fashion is timeless, and that even things identified with a particular time can be repackaged into something interesting and fresh, paying homage to the old while carrying on with the new. Horned-rim glasses, fine wool suits, and houndstooth patterns may have found themselves into Urban Outfitter’s window display, but that shouldn’t diminish their classic beauty.  Are you going to let some 15 year old get the better of an iconic style that’s been around since before her grandmother was a zygote?

No, there aren't any lenses in those frames, they fell out during the Fallout Boy concert.

These are my prescription glasses. What's my prescription? 20/Dumbass.

The AoM list, while certainly accurate in many ways, is a bit on the stuffy side. After I read it suddenly the world was sort of in sepia and moved in that fast, jittery pace like in old silent movies. But the list has made me want to try my own hand at enumerating certain fashion elements that resist the wears of time.

1) Watches That Do Other Things – Because it’s not good enough that it can tell time, it should also be able to affect our sperm count.

2) Gold – I’ve already spoken about the importance of pimp cups, but really almost another with a porous surface can be gilded. At no point should a true Postmodern Gentleman think that atomic number 79* is too gaudy an accessory.

3) Member’s Only jackets – Like a cockroach, these jackets absolutely will not quit; terrible haggard jokes be damned. Am I the last member? Last like a fox! oh!

4) That huge phone Zach Morris had. – It was just awesome. The first and last phone you could use to call in air strikes against Charlie.

5) Cardigans – Cardigans have been huge for men these last 20 seasons and continue to be a strong presence in any Postmodern Gentleman’s arsenal. Just remember, before leaving your peaceful domicile, to change into proper attire.

mrrogers_image

6) Parachute Pants – Oh, why the hell not.

*The same cannot be said for atomic number 92.

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